Wednesday May 11

A few years ago, as Lucie and I approached our thirtieth anniversary, I pondered for weeks what would be an appropriate gift to mark the milestone. Although I'd successfully managed to project a glittering image of myself to others during those years, I'd failed her countless times. More than any other person, Lucie has faithfully endured storms caused by my sometimes demanding, demeaning, hateful behavior. She has been witness to some of my darkest and most shameful moments. Numerous times I've given her justifiable cause to withhold her love or even walk away from our marriage. Instead, she has faithfully remained with me as a constant and dazzling expression of the unconditional love, devotion and faithfulness of Jesus to me.

Therefore I wanted to present her with something more exceptional than any gift I'd ever given to her. Oddly, what kept coming to my mind was jewelry. This was off for one simple reason: I hate jewelry, mostly because I believe that it's frivolous, a waste. As our anniversary grew nearer, I though of the petite, inexpensive diamond ring I'd scrounged up enough money to purchase for her over thirty years ago. I couldn't seem to escape wondering how special she'd feel if I presented her with a new diamond ring. Yet, instinctively I reasoned, Have you gone soft in the head? What are you thinking? Are you an idiot? You hate jewelry! Jewelry is a waste!

Reflecting back, I'm confident that I've never given a gift, at least one that can be purchased, that had more meaning and significance than the diamond ring that she's proudly worn since June 5, 2006. She's fully aware that to me a gift of jewelry seems a waste. Yet I know that to her the ring I gave her is a beautiful thing. And we both know that my gift was given from a heart filled with undying devotion, gratitude and love.

breaking the rules - fil anderson (157-8)